Excusing Your Way To Failure?

Hello Everybody, I am so tired of making excuses for my actions. I am so tired of other people making excuses for their actions! I am so tired of people making excuses for other people. As Dani Johnson so kindly put it, "An Excuse is a well planned lie!" I never knew how many excuses I was making for my self, until I consciously made a decision not to make excuses for my self. I have been making excuses for my self in a lot of areas in my life. No wonder I'm not where I planned to be at this time in my life. Before I go any further I want to define Rationalization. Rationalization (also known as making excuses) is an unconscious defense mechanism in which perceived controversial behaviors or feelings are logically justified and explained in a rational or logical manner in order to avoid any true explanation, and are made consciously tolerable – or even admirable and superior – by plausible means. Rationalization encourages irrational or unacceptable behavior, motives, or feelings and often involves ad hoc hypothesizing. This process ranges from fully conscious (e.g. to present an external defense against ridicule from others) to mostly subconscious (e.g. to create a block against internal feelings of guilt). People rationalize for various reasons. Rationalization may differentiate the original deterministic explanation of the behavior or feeling in question. Sometimes rationalization occurs when we think we know ourselves better than we do. It is also an informal fallacy of reasoning. If you, like myself, are someone who is a habitual excuse maker it might be a good idea to ask yourself why you deliberately choose to be less than truthful. Do you fear the scrutiny of friends, family, or coworkers? Are you uncomfortable with opening yourself up to others? Sometimes, making up a lame excuse to avoid trying something new. Are you afraid your lack of "know how" would make you feel inadequate, vulnerable, or foolish? Are your excuses meant to inflate your worthiness in the eyes of others? Ego does play a factor in habitual excuse making. However, indulging in ego-boosting through excuse making will likely have the reverse result: deflated personal self-worth. You can trick others into believing a lie, but convincing yourself is not as easy. Or is it? If you tell a lie convincingly enough and you get away with it you may also begin believing it yourself. It's true. Overtime, an excuse-maker will start buying into his own cons and, as a result, live a lie. Some Common Excuses *I don't know how to....... *I don't have anything to wear to........ *I'm so tired........ *I have never done.......... *It's O.K no one will find out........ *I don't drink water because....... *I can't start my own business because....... *I can't make friends because...... *I can't eat healthy because....... *I can't exercise because...... *We are getting a divorce because........ *I have no talents........ *I can't pray because....... And the list could go on and on. We can't continue to make excuses for ourselves or the people around us. Excuses will allow you to stay in the same place and become stagnant in all areas of life. Now Let's take a look at how we can stop making excuses for ourselves. Tips To Not Making Excuses *List all your excuses for why you have not, or cannot, accomplish a particular goal. Then, go through each one, and find ways to get around, or solve, each one. There is always a way, but as long as those excuses sit in your head without being addressed, they remain obstacles. Example: "I can't get a job because I don't have a car." Can you borrow a car to get to job interviews, or save money to rent one? Utilize public transportation, or ride a bike? Buy a used moped or scooter? Can you move closer to where the job are? *Move Now! Don't accept any excuse or reason to procrastinate. If you find yourself acting like the world is against you, almost as if the world is trying to stop you from getting ahead, you may be a pessimist. * Motivate yourself to move with "Self Talk". Don't give into negative thoughts or feelings! Don't be lead by your emotions! Talk your self into doing what you know you need to do in order to be successful. *Write out your long term and short term goals. Once you reach a goal write down the date completed next to the goal achieved. This will allow you to see that "You CAN do it!" *Set and question your priorities. Sometimes it takes many failed trials to reach a pattern that works because you may run into unexpected obstacles - good valid reasons for the old habit that must be understood and accepted in order to make the change. Ask why you are making the change - if you are not doing it for yourself but to please someone else, it may not bring any benefits at all. Realistic, practical goals broken down into smaller steps that build on small successes to reach a long term goal are the patterns that work. *Face your Fears Head On. Sometimes fear paralyzes us and stops us from moving forward. Figure out who or what is it that we are afraid of. Then decided whether or not you want to make an excuse for this fear and let it stop you from reaching your goal or living the life you've always dreamed of. The choice is yours! *Create a Positive Mindset. Meditate on and speak only positive things. *Make a daily schedule or task list and check tasks off once they've been completed. I choose to no longer make excuses and to live my life to the fullest! An Excuse is bondage in my opinion! I will no longer be tied down and imprisoned by my excuses! I will Move Forward and live my life free from excuses. That's my choice and my decision. I hope it's your also. Thanks for stopping by. Have a great day! God bless!